The Daily Honky Tonk
186th Edition
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
6:32 PM
So, I’ve returned to Provo. Not much else to say there. Provo is pretty much my home at this point. Going home is visiting. It was nice though. It was good to be around family. It was nice to learn a lot more about my parents that I didn’t know. I love learning from people’s experiences. Experiences are in my mind the best teacher. They illustrate best what we have learned. Principles are nice, but they are so wide and not specific. Principles applied to specific experiences teach me things that I wouldn’t understand otherwise.
The family reunion on the farm was excellent. It was so nice to see family. It’s nice to be older and to understand better the varying personalities and watch how they interact. Families are some of the greatest teachers I know.
I’m digging into myself and trying to understand some things. I’m hoping writing will help. I hope that as you read, you will have experiences you can share with me personally or publically that have helped you.
Patience
Two of the main topics that I study in the Gospel are patience and charity. I can always use a lot more of both of these.
I’m out of school until fall semester. I have over a month where I’ll just be working a few hours a day. I’m used to keeping myself so incredibly busy that I don’t usually have any time for myself. Now that I have all this time for myself, I’m tempted to fill it back up . . .but I think the Lord wants me to learn to relax. To be patient with life and accept the pace of life and not how I hectically try to live it.
I was about to pick up a book today, when I saw the Ensign sitting on my roommates computer and the headling “Slowing Down and Putting God First”. Those who put God first slow down I wandered? I keep trying to dedicate all my actions and thoughts and life choices to Him and to do as much as I can for my Heavenly Father. In short, I picked up the article and read it.
This part stuck out to me the most- the subtitle was :Don’t be in a hurry to Fill Your Days with “Busyness”
“A national journalist shared the following blunt assessment: “A good Mormon is a busy Mormon.” A historian has also observed that “in Mormon culture . . .action is esteemed over contemplation.” Noting the Church’s mandate to prepare the world for the Millennium, the author wondered if our sense of “urgency, [initially] fed by noble purposefulness, [might] morph into busyness.
It is true that we have work enough to do, but when it comes to busyness, we may be taking our cues from the world rather than the Lord and His servants.” Elder Neal A. Maxwell of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles cautioned us against a “frantic, heedless busyness . . . [that often] crowds out contemplation and . . . leaves no time for renewal.” He likened thoughtful “intervals between [our] tasks” to “the green belts of grass, trees, and water that . . . Interrupt the asphalt,” and he said that when we “plan some time for contemplation and renewal,” we will feel drawn to our work instead of driven to it.
Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin of the Quorum of the Twelve observed how easily we fill our lives with “appointments, meetings, and tasks” and then act frightened at the prospect of some quiet time. Why would that be? He feared that we might “feel that the busier we are, the mor important we are – as though our busyness defines our worth.” On another occasion, he reminded us that “being busy is not necessarily being spiritual” - for in fact, noise and busyness can actually crowd out the still, small voice of the Spirit”.
President Gordon B. Hinckley prescribed a remedy for this fever of busyness: meditation, or pondering, or introspection. President Hinckley recalled that his father “never ceased growing” because he made time for thinking, meditating, [and] pondering.” You may have to turn off your TV, computer, cell phone, or MP3 Player, but it’s worth it. As Sister Bonnie D. Parkin, former Relief Society general president, put it: “take time to slow down and ponder so that you can feel the Lord’s love for you.”
I like this article, but I have some questions on application of the principles:
I do more than enough contemplation and pondering - my parents have told me that multiple times . . In fact one of the lessons that I felt was most important for me was “stop thinking and just act”. . . While I am very well aware of the power of pondering and contemplation and believe it is good. . .there are times when contemplation and pondering is so stressful for me that I would prefer to be busy and not to have to think. Any suggestions for replacements?
How does one renew? I’m so used to not taking time for myself and thinking that most of the time my needs are selfish . . . How and what is renewal like?
It says if we relax we will feel drawn to our work. I think this could apply to a lot of other parts of our life. Sometimes I feel like I have to keep myself driven to things. .. I feel like a lot of things don’t draw me and I have to find within myself my own power. . . Else I have always considered that if I didn’t press myself, I would run from most things just because its so much work and energy. . . Oh the fears and the anxieties of life. Can anyone relay an experience in which they learned how to let go and then were drawn to things more naturally?
What are some ways you handle your own stresses?
“Patience is the capacity to endure delay, trouble, opposition, or suffering without becoming angry, frustrated, or anxious. It is the ability to do God’s will and accept His timing. When you are patient, you hold up under pressure and are able to face adversity calmly and hopefully. Patience is related to hope and faith – you must wait for the Lord’s promised blessings to be fulfilled.
You need patience in your everyday experiences and relationships, especially with your companion. You must be patient with all people, yourself included, as you work to overcome faults and weaknesses.” (PMG)
**I have read this quote over and over again to remind myself that being anxious and frustrated and angry is not the feeling Heavenly Father intends me to have. Usually it has to do with my want for control over my life. I’ve watched lots of people who suffer because they just let life happen to them. The extreme is that they feel like they have no control over their life or what is happening or what they are feeling. Most of us go back and forth between the two. I could learn a little about letting some parts of life just happen to me.
“Strive to love as He loves, with unfailing compassion, patience, and mercy.”
**I struggle to love myself with mercy. Mercy means giving people the benefit of the doubt. Generally they mean the best things and even if they do stupid things they aren’t usually intending to hurt another person. Life, feelings, making choices are all difficult . . . Part of mercy is being patient while waiting to understand, to grow, and to change. I beat myself up for not making changes or growing fast enough.
“Others seek only to have fun in life. With this as their main goal, they allow temporary pleasure to distract them from lasting happiness. They rob themselves of the enduring joys of spiritual growth, service, and hard work.”
**I think busyness is the other extreme of this .. .in my mind, only do things that are joys that come through endurance. . .only spiritually grow, only serve others the best you know how, only work hard. I struggle to give myself time to just enjoy some parts of life . . . I tend to think that my time is spent selfishly when I’m not working for something outside of me. However, after reading about Winston Churchill (who was so effective as an individual partially because he knew how to completely relax when he took time to relax) and realizing that this is not a healthy attitude. .. I could really use some experiences and stories about doing things for oneself and the blessing that came from it.
I liked this quote I found that Amy sent me, I wrote it down in my journal one day when I was trying to work past some troubles through writing.
“The greatest handicap: Fear
The best day: Today
The worst bankruptcy: Loss of enthusiasm
The hardest thing: To begin”
The Editor,
Mark
Mark, Great post- it got me thinking!
ReplyDeleteI think I cheat, because my meditation typically comes when I run, it's how I get out my stress, and at the same time I feel like I accomplished something and exacted some control over myself. During my runs my mind clears, and answers to problems just come to me.
There's also a difference between mediation and analization.
This is a fabulous topic for discussion. Thanks for sharing.
Mark,
ReplyDeleteI actually learned the "I need ME time" lesson a few weeks ago (see my blog for further details) :) but I take time to just sing, or play an instrument, or JUST sit and listen to music, or go to a concert. GO do something that you enjoy that keeps your mind activated, but isn't WORK. To me, THAT is relaxing. Hope that helps-? :)